“A Spiritual Question to be asked”
As we touch base with friends it’s common to ask how their jobs, family or even their personal life is going, but how about their spiritual life? It may seem a bit awkward to say, “So, how’s that spiritual walk going,” but as I caught up with a friend that’s where I found the conversation…
To be honest, I wasn’t feeling very spiritual myself, and felt discouraged by it. It wasn’t a lack of faith. It wasn’t bitterness. It wasn’t even a lack of knowledge. Frankly, I wasn’t sure what it was, but I knew it felt off. I still read my Bible, but it felt more like a rhythm than a desire. I still prayed for others as requests came in, but it became another thing on the to do list. I knew God was all around and had not moved, but I seemed to lack focus and perseverance in my spiritual walk…I was missing that fire within.
I took some time after the conversation with my friend to consider where my thoughts had been lately and really considered my inner cry to The Lord to awaken this weariness. I wanted to return to my desire to read His Word and lean back into quality time with Him out of love, not obligation. At first, I was ashamed to admit I was feeling this way…kind of lukewarm. Thoughts such as, ‘it’s probably a result of not doing enough or not saying yes to more’ flickered across my mind and before I knew it, I was exhausted from wondering what more I could do to awaken my slumbering soul. The could’ve, would’ve, should’ves had crept in and the author of lies convinced me of a million more tasks to do in order to ‘feel better.’
Not long after this, I came across a song with the lyrics, “I don’t always feel it, but that’s when I need it the most, so I’m going to keep on singing till my soul catches up with my song. God, You’ve been gracious, faithful, whatever I’m feeling or facing and the struggle keeps me honest and it breaks down my walls of pride.”
The lyrics pierced me as my focus shifted off all the feelings, the to do’s and into thoughts that reminded me to consider “who is God to me?” As I placed my focus on Him, my heart then became overwhelmed with gratitude of how patient God is with me, even when I am stubborn. He guides me along paths in life that strengthen my inner being and teaches me to trust His plan. He reminds me along the way to look back and see His faithfulness and rely on knowing He is a God of detail, always knowing what I need. He isn’t a God that makes tally marks on a clipboard as He watches from above; He is a God that remains near, listening and awaiting my words or concerns.
And just like that, I felt a fire within that was rekindled with wonder of simply how great our God is.
I hope I am not the only follower of Christ that has felt the fire dwindle, yet kept moving forward not wanting to address it. But I feel confident the enemy would love more than anything for us to remain silent, so if you are stagnant in your walk and need to hear, “How are you spiritually,” let me be that friend to encourage you. If you are reading this and have a mighty fire within, take time to consider asking this question to others as an entry way to rekindle their flame.
