“What’s Behind a Portrait”
Three family portraits, each taken years apart hang on the wall. If you were to visit my home, you would see these pictures scattered among our walls. Perhaps you would notice the lush green setting chosen by the photographer or the giddy little girls sitting on our laps. Maybe the big smiles and perfect placement of each person would catch your attention. Regardless of what catches our eyes in photos, we are naturally drawn to photos as if they offer a glimpse into other’s lives.
As the mother within these family portraits on my wall, can I share what really went on behind those smiles over the last decade? A glimpse into the heart and behind the smiles?...
On the far-left wall hangs a brightly colored canvas with three people. A husband climbing the corporate ladder at work, a mother nestling into motherhood and a sweet spirited blonde baby girl. The husband is battling tug-o-war with success and isolation. He yearns for respect and obtains it in the workplace by working an eighty-hour week away from his family. The mother absorbs motherhood to fill the void. She spends her time keeping baby girl on a schedule and dreams of Starbucks and Target runs with buggy seat covers, of course.
To the far right hangs another canvas; this one with four people. Baby girl number two has arrived 3 years later and compliments the family well. She is full of excitement and passion. She is often referenced as the werewolf as she does not sleep beyond a few hours until she is 8 months old. She has proven diapers do not hold everything and tested her parents’ patience. Daddy sits tall with his arms proudly wrapped around his daughters as he now owns a local business and has laid down his idol leaving his former job. His days are spent near his home and is experiencing joy in The Lord. Mom hunches forward a bit in the picture as she wrestles to keep the baby girl positioned properly. Her eyes are filled with fatigue and doubt as she questions herself daily, “Can I keep doing this, be a good mother, juggle a full-time job with sleepless nights?” Her days of sipping lattes and scheduled naps are long gone. Life’s demands have taken root allowing a heavy heart to settle.
Lastly, the family portrait you see first. The one hanging right beside the dining room table, taken years later. Lush green shrubbery as the setting, husband and wife both mindlessly wearing the same shirt as a previous portrait years before. The husband’s stance is strong and sturdy with his hand placed on his wife’s knee. Baby girl has a pouty face and pigtails. The oldest daughter’s boot shines with a gold zipper more noticeable than her dress pattern. Then there is mama... She sits tall with her hand around her husband’s arm. Not because she has found the rhythm of motherhood or had more time to flat iron her hair, but because she has learned who holds her heart and guides her next step, her Lord and Savior. Joy overrides happiness and uncertainty is met with God’s Word. Surrender and early morning quiet time steady her thoughts. She sits tall with her arm around her husband because her Heavenly Father has poured grace and mercy upon her marriage, family, and life. She has learned to remove the burdens from her chest and place them at the feet of Jesus. Her life isn’t easy; refereeing children, juggling tasks, and wearing multiple hats follow her daily, but life’s experiences have brought wisdom and perspective.
Take a moment to look back on your life and recall the trials. What lessons have you learned? We desire change and hope for wisdom, yet cannot gain either without experiences. As Romans 5:3,4 reminds us,” Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”
If you are caught in a season of doubt, simply worn out and wondering when it will pass, hold on to His promises. Trust that He is building a foundation, molding your thoughts and can produce joy within you. And consider glancing at some old photos around your home to see how much you have grown?
