"“More than a ‘mom’ Moment”
“Mom, she is so annoying! Everything she does bothers me and I keep waiting for it to change, but it hasn’t changed!”
If you have more than one child, you have probably walked the long, weary road of sibling arguments. If you haven’t, please inbox me because I need to know your formula!
I have no doubt that deep inside my children love each other, but most days I am met with bickering moments, snarky remarks and the stank eye between them. As I listened to one of my daughters belly ache about her sister, I found myself digging deep to find a solution. Too often, I feel more like a referee than a mom, but even referees know what team to give the ball to…sometimes as a mom I understand both sides and am left wondering what call to make and what solution to offer.
I understood my daughter’s desire to be heard and validated, yet something told me there was a deeper message to be given and a bigger lesson to be taught. I asked my daughter if she had prayed about this frustration. To my surprise she said, “Yes, a lot, but nothing seems to change, she is still annoying, it’s pointless!” If I had a whistle, I’d call a timeout at this moment because I suddenly had a game plan!
I began with talking about God’s timeline versus our own timeline when it came to answered prayers. So often, we spend a lot of time asking God to change circumstances in a specific way that we completely miss the process of sanctification as we wait. If we aren’t mindful, we assume He just isn’t responding and overlook what He’s teaching us. Our conversation evolved into discussing how to look in the mirror for mistakes we may have made and how to consider offering grace and patience to others. As we continually include God in our daily frustrations, we can ask Him to help us see others in a new way and practice walking out the fruits of The Spirit instead of just knowing them.
As exhausting as these referee moments are, I am learning to embrace them. If we didn’t have these conversations with our children, how would we guide them to take all of their struggles to God? If they didn’t confide in us, how would we teach them to identify the emotion, learn how to consider offering grace(that we receive every day from our Father)and grow in healthy knowledge of how to navigate hard moments.
And if I didn’t stop to consider a bigger picture, then I wouldn’t be able to teach valuable lessons to them for the road ahead.
Friends, parenting is not for the faint of heart. It takes some grit. It takes a little perspective, and we all know it takes a lot of Jesus. Ask Him to help you have patience when you are head butted with these moments and dig deep for a bigger message. Turn to His Word everyday for wisdom and insight as you continue on this path.
