“What do you desire?”
I stopped by the local gift shoppe for a last-minute gift. Instructing my children not to act like heathens, we entered the quaint, decorated store. As I browsed for my selection, my oldest daughter appeared with a gift in hand, “Mom, I’d like to get this for my sister for Christmas, could we sneak it to the counter for them to wrap it real fast and I want to use my own money to buy it for her.” Beaming with pride at the sweet moment, I pointed her to the salesclerk to seal the deal.
Moments later, little sister appears with the same item. “Mom, will you buy me this? I really want it.” Still relishing in the proud moment, I blissfully respond, “Maybe another time honey, let’s not get that today.”
I wish I could say our ‘Norman Rockwell’ moment remained….
Crocodile tears burst onto the scene, whiney cries began and the stank eye was given.
“Whyyyy mom? It’s such a good book, I’ll do chores today! How come you won’t get it, it’s what I really, reallllllly want!!”
As I attempted to gain control of my small gremlin, muttering statements between gritted teeth, a clear message for her came to mind, “I know you want this very badly, but if you trust me, I promise something great will happen in time.”
Ummmm…. Did I just gain a lesson for myself as I wrestled with my child in the store?
So often, my thoughts become entangled with ‘what I want in life, when I want it.’ I may not stomp my foot or whine aloud, but I allow the frustration to consume me and complain of my unmet expectations. When I become focused on my own agenda in life, I forget the message behind God’s promises. Sometimes it’s a simple desire, but many times, it’s a deep desire that is accompanying a wait.
If you are in a season of waiting, you know how hard it can be at times.
There was a time in my life that I struggled with believing God was a good Father. Relationships were not healing as quickly as I wanted, and disappointment surrounded me. Why wouldn’t God deliver like I knew He could? Didn’t He know what my heart desired?
A friend spoke of God’s promises within Psalms 37 and reminded me of this, “God has not forgotten the desires of your heart.” It was a simple but refreshing message for my weary heart. As I searched this chapter for more patience and understanding, bold statements appeared.
“Trust in the Lord…..”
“Take delight in the Lord….”
“Commit your way to the Lord….”
“Be still before the Lord and wait patiently….”
“Hope in the Lord and keep His way…..”
If your heart is awaiting something in life, know that God knows your innermost desires. But…. also know that He desires your whole heart first. Commit your way to Him, find contentment and joy in Him.
When I look back at moments in my life, I see God revealing and orchestrating more than I could ever fathom; reminding me He knows my hearts desires. But He also knows what is best for me; teaching me how to find everlasting joy and contentment through Him first and revealing new prayers.
My youngest pouted as we left the store that day….never realizing her big sister had it all taken care of….and I left the store reminding myself God will always do the same.
Merry Christmas!
